The missing link

One moment of rudeness, unfortunately, is greater than a hundred moments of politeness.

One moment of another’s rudeness is greater than ten thousand moments of our own.

If ten people around you suffered from a weakness that you did not, would it be odd if you concluded that you were that much stronger than them?

This is what happens in our daily lives.

We observe, rightly, a flaw of some kind in other people. Something that is just not good enough.

On an average day we may witness say a 100 flaws in others.

Supposing we are truly introspective, we may acknowledge perhaps one or two faults in ourselves…if even that.

This simple delusional data that we collect on a daily basis causes many of us to live under the continual impression that we are better than most other people within our sphere of influence.

It’s difficult, if not impossible, to love when we consistently operate out of this platform of being better because we possess lesser flaws.

Idiotically the closer (more comfortable with) we are to a person we feel the urgent, often irrepressible, need to point out this flaw.

Like a sneeze we cannot control, we just have to say  “ Hey! I know you think you’re the cats whiskers but this proves that you aren’t as good as you think you are.”

(It also proves that I’m better than you are)

Love needs an inner strength.

I cannot be accusing somebody; finding fault, complaining, yet convince myself that I love him or her.

That’s like consistently and consciously kicking the ball into my own goal and expecting the man of the match award!

Love needs our affirmation. Hate needs our accusation.

Love needs our silence.

Hate says “ I can’t tolerate such……” Or,  “I’m saying this for your own good.”

An ant may lift a bulldozer before inner weakness produces love.

It is not that we actively produce hate, but that we are too weak to love.

This world is a gymnasium, and mystically it is able to exercise both our weakness and our strength.

Our strength lies in our ability to surrender the need to defend ourselves.

Our weakness lies in our fear of not protecting ourselves.

Our circumstances and relationships are the treadmills and dumbbells to build up both our surrender and our defense, but one is built up always at the cost of the other.

Love grows with our ability to suffer unjustly. I cannot fight for my rights and love.

In this world that we are born into, we don’t need to produce hate. It is the natural darkness in the absence of love.

We are born as natural vessels of hate. Life offers us the opportunities to give birth to love.

This world is also like a womb.

If we die in our natural state, we die the death of the stillborn.

Success is in the strong inner person.

Success lies in restraint. When what we know does not compel us. When what is right for us is never wrong for someone else.

Be strong of heart. Courageous. Wait. Wait. Wait. You will receive your right, and love, if only you will not fight for it.

Our strength lies in presumed weakness.

Joseph Thevercad, ACC

A Certified Coach, Coach U alumni, Associate Certified Coach and ICF member, Joseph has been the HR Director heading both Organisation Development and Human Resources in two different industries – Hospitality and Media. In 2011 he founded his firm called “The You Tomorrow” ( URL http://theyoutomorrow.com/ ) and offers Coaching for Businesses, Executives and Life. He may be contacted at joseph@TheYouTomorrow.com.



Getting the Financial Commitment

Turning your Interested Prospect into a Paying Client

Suddenly, there's a knot in your stomach (where did that come from?) and you start to stammer. Your internal dialogue kicks into high gear. "Can I really deliver what the client needs?” “They will never pay my rates.” Without realizing it, you're getting in your own way. Asking for the financial commitment can be one of the most challenging steps for coaches building their business.

Here are 3 steps that make a difference when asking for the financial commitment.

1. Be absolutely clear on the value you offer. In order to increase your clarity on this, identify and clarify your "unique processes" - elements of your professional experience, coach training and personal history that support your coaching skills. Your training and your own personal development and learning, have helped you develop skills that have value to a coaching client.
2. Understand your beliefs and how they show up in client objections. Beliefs are feelings of certainty. What are your beliefs about asking for the financial commitment? Notice your prospects' objections. Are they a reflection of your core beliefs? If your prospect says, 'Your services are too expensive,”' investigate whether you secretly believe your services are too expensive. What beliefs do you need to adopt to support you in creating a win-win opportunity for you and your potential client.
3. Know how to present your prices and services. Get clear on the coaching programs you offer. The language and presentation of your services and fees allows you to guide the prospect with certainty, which increase their confidence in your ability to deliver what you say.

Here are a few tips to keep in mind:

• Consider offering three different coaching programs. This gives the potential client options based on their goals and financial budget
• Position the coaching investment based on a monthly retainer not an hourly rate. The value of coaching often happens during and beyond the actual coaching sessions.
• Always identify the value and ask for the commitment before you talk about fees. Remember individuals buy for emotional reasons and justify with logic. Support your potential client to be clear of what they REALLY want to create in their life. Say, "Coaching is all about commitment. Do you feel you're at a place to get the results you stated you wanted today?" If they say yes, you are well on your way of getting a motivated, committed paying client.
• Ask for the financial commitment. This may sound obvious, but it is easy to avoid the direct question. “What program would work best for you’? “How would you like to pay for your coaching Visa or MasterCard?”

Teresia LaRocque MCC

As coaches, it's our job to support people in committing to have the life they truly want. If you're not asking for the financial commitment, you're not giving the prospect a chance to win. But when you follow these steps to sealing the deal, you position everyone to move ahead.


Teresia LaRocque MCC, is Director of Entrepreneurship and Business Building Mentor for the Erickson Business Center –  www.ericksonbusinesscenter.com at Erickson College International www.erickson.edu. Teresia is a pioneer in the booming profession of personal coaching, the first recipient of the International Coach Federation’s Master Coach Credential in Canada and cofounder for the Vancouver International Coach Federation chapter.  Teresia is committed to supporting coaches to take their talent and passion for coaching and make their entrepreneurial dreams come true.

Teresia is the founder and facilitator of the Passion into Profit Program, a customized business building program offered through the Erickson Business Center. For free business building tips and advice, join us on Facebook at www.facebook.com/EricksonBusinessCenter.

Six ways to successfully work from home

1. Remove distractions. Depending on what distracts you, this can mean: silencing your cell phone, using a different Web browser for work-related searching,  keeping the television off, shutting the door, taking the kids to daycare, removing clutter from your workspace, etc.

2. Create rules (and stick to them). If you don’t live alone, this is especially important! Kids and significant others may equate working from home to being available throughout the day. It is very important to make rules and forge a daily routine that will keep your work-life balance in check.

3. Take breaks. Get up and stretch! Take a walk around the block, and just get away from your computer. Schedule lunch dates with friends. If you like to be able to do household tasks during the day, use your breaks to unload the dishwasher, start a load of laundry, or feed the family dog. Just don’t get distracted to handle larger tasks that need more time!

4. Make your space yours. Ensure that you have enough lighting, a good chair, a professional desk, and personal touches that make you enjoy using the workspace.  Any room can be made yours with a fresh coat of paint, new furniture, and/or personal touches (such as artwork, photos, etc.).

5. Don’t underestimate a remote office. If you need a change in scenery, and your work makes it possible, take your computer to a local coffee shop or library. Many places offer free Wi-Fi these days, take advantage of it and be refreshed at the same time.

6. Get dressed. If you have a hard time staying focused and on task, try dressing the part. Before you start working in the morning, remove the comfortable robe and slippers and change into something you would wear into an office. Primp as you would if you were leaving the house: hair, makeup, etc. 

What are your tips and tricks to successfully working from home? Share them below!

Want to read more? Check out this interesting article from the New York Times: How to make working from home work for you.

Practices and Projects: The Core of Coaching

Energy Work and Coaching Community of Practice
November 16, 2012 11:00 a.m. (New York)
Call In: +1.712.451.6000
Pin: 427724
Facilitator: Rhona Post, MA MCC CCIP, www.thehealercoach.com, rpost@thehealercoach.com
CCEU: 1

Welcome to the last 2012 tele-class for the Community of Practice for Energy Work and Coaching. Over the year I have incorporated three different modalities in the calls—mindfulness, somatic coaching and Core Individuation energy work. Using this three-pronged approach we have touched upon issues that influence and impact our way of being with clients and learned specific practices we can do that strengthen our core competencies in the areas of Centered Presence, Active Listening, Powerful Questions, and Direct Communication.

Participants have brought courage, commitment and playfulness to these coaching sessions, demonstrating skill and ease as they tackle new practices.

James Flaherty, my first coaching teacher used to say we have private and public identities; often these identities differ. Our pubic identity may show us as successful, powerful, even happy, while our private identity is built upon shame or guilt. Our job as coaches is to both awaken our clients to explore these identities and provide practices they can do to close the gaps between these identities. Why? We all want to experience wholeness-that sense of ease and spaciousness guiding us to be open to possibilities.

During each monthly call we experiment with different practices, using the time as a mini -laboratory. Like our clients, we resonate towards some practices and resist doing others. Ironically, the practices we resist doing are the ones that will bring us the best results.



Rhona Post, MCC

If you have tried a practice during the year, and let it go, please bring your questions to our November class. Our inclination towards short cuts, coping mechanisms, tips and techniques overrides our good intention to practice. We’re in search of the magic bullet. What gets in your way of practicing? 
As time allows, we will review the distinctions between practices and projects. Developing proficiency in a core competence requires practice and patience. We will tease apart the concept of patience, exploring its components, from acceptance to irritation. What you discover will inform you how your beliefs shape your emotions, actions and results.

For more information on Energy work and Coaching, and how I successfully integrate these discourses in my coaching please give me a call at +1.941.554.8466. Individual Healer Coaching sessions are available as well. Be Well. Be Happy, Rhona Post, The Healer Coach

Nobody cares about coaching

For last decade there is a lot written and said about coaching. Just search the word 'coaching' in Google and you will find dozens of pages of links. You can find conferences, coaching courses, books and articles, blogs and websites. You can see details of accreditation, schools and coaching models, different definitions, techniques, and samples of coaching session.

Many people forget that except coaches (and coaching trainers) no one cares about coaching. The vast majority of individual consumers care about get what they desired or eliminate what they do not want in their lives. Jeffrey J. Fox, author of sales and marketing books, underlines that "the customer cares only about himself and his problem." He cares about the result.

Probably every coach met with utter ignorance and lack of understanding the coaching approach by the individual client. He comes to a coach just because he believes, often not too much, that he can improve his situation.

Aware client says: I want to manage people better, I want to improve my performance, I want to plan my career, I want to make the best decision, I need to regain the desire and the power to act, I need motivation and regular maintenance of concentration, I want to rebuild relationships in the family, I want to stop addiction, I want to lose weight, I want to go on a trip around the world, I want to build my own business and avoid common mistakes, etc.

Coaching is a way of working with a person or a team, as well as consulting, mentoring, training and psychotherapy. Each of these approaches has its own methods and the techniques and principles how to use them. Much of the basic concepts and techniques are very similar to most approaches, that is why the line between coaching and other ways of working is so thin.

Margaret Zukowska advises to coaches to avoid in marketing language used in coaching education. The statements follow the customer, dancing with the client, powerful questions, deep relationship, coach accreditation, are understandable only, often not entirely, by the initiated.

The situation is slightly better in business organizations. International companies know coaching, which is used in the West for decades. HR staff learn in coaching schools and managers use coaching style in management. Selecting external coaches they often pay attention to its certification.

However, as with individual clients, organizations depend on the final result. Especially when HR is evaluated for the selection of an appropriate professional.

Finally it is not important if it will be called coaching, follow-up, supporting the implementation of skills or individual training. At the end customer does not care coaching, he cares about the result.

Wojciech Pazdzior
career coach | trainer | HR consultant
More at www.ative-strategy.com
Originally posted here: http://active-strategy.com/blog/



Wojciech Pazdzior

Wojciech Pazdzior has worked for the last 9 years as a trainer, coach, and consultant. He inspires and supports individuals, teams and organizations in deriving full satisfaction from work and life. Wojciech leads his programs with coaching approach, experiential learning (indoor and outdoor), metaphors and he looks for purposefulness in everything he does.

Wojciech’s expertise is career management, leadership and coaching skills, emotional intelligence, interpersonal skills, teamwork. He has coached entrepreneurs and managers helping them to discover their talents, define goals, build self-confidence, provoke actions and to make key decisions. He supports organizations in designing manager’s development processes and leads long-term talent/ high potential development processes.

He has supported many international companies and experienced many sectors, what gives him wide understanding of his clients.

Associated Certified Coach (ACC) by International Coach Federation. Speaker and trainer in MBA and postgraduate programs in 3 universities in Poland. Trainer and co-author of Executive Leadership Study.