Coach Those Who Are Holding Up the World on Behalf of Us All

If there's a more beleaguered group of leaders outside of nonprofits -- especially those who serve the poor -- I don't know who they are. Just when donations are down, the need for food, shelter and jobs is exploding for the people they serve.

For leaders on the front line fighting poverty, it's way beyond 'doing more with less'. They wrestle daily with how to keep the doors open to their constituents and keep their staff engaged, inspired and contributing. As for leadership development for themselves and their team, well, that’s a pipe dream.

And this is where coaches come in. If you're looking for a client base that’s hungry for what you have to offer, look no further.

There are nonprofit leaders in your city right now who can only imagine having a partner who is 100 percent committed to seeing them thrive, amidst deeply challenging circumstances.

Don’t be surprised if you find yourself coaching the senior leadership team. Many nonprofits are small to mid-sized, so you’ll probably start at the top of the organization, where your impact is greatest.

Call them forth by asking, What’s waiting to happen here? What are you on the edge of? Then watch out! The senior team – and you – will be off and running.

Odds are they can’t pay you much. But times will get better. And don’t forget these organizations have a Board of Directors, often filled with influential business leaders who could use coaching in their companies. So your networking and referral opportunities may abound.

As you consider who you might serve the best, remember those who serve the most.

Cathy Perry PCC, CPCC, is founder of The InwardBound Center for Nonprofit Leadership. The Center brings leadership coaching and training to organizations who serve the poor, and envisions the day when these organizations are ranked among the finest places to work.

Registered 501(c)(3); accepts tax-deductible donations. www.InwardBoundCenter.org

One small step for man. One giant leap for joy.

"The universe has been evolving for 13 billion years. It's unlikely that its ultimate goal is consumerism" - Brian Swimme

Now there's a thought.

At the recent wonderfully organised ICF European Conference in Madrid many speakers highlighted the current malaise in economics, sustainability, happiness etc. And wherever you are living and working I'm sure there are examples of recent environmental impact, economic slowdown/collapse, social need. If there's one thing that is apparent right now it's that in some way we're all in this together. The big question that seemed to be hanging after Madrid (beyond where are the female voices in all this - I for one would love to hear a few more) was "OK, but what can we do?"

For me this leads to a more specific question - what am I personally helping to bring into the world? Many years ago John Elkington put together the neat idea of the Triple Bottom Line - people, profit, planet. It's age old wisdom, packaged for the current era. And it's really getting traction now. Charities I'm working with are very clear about their need to be financially responsible and indeed attractive to money in order to do their good work - money is an enabler, not a fiend. And businesses I'm working with are increasingly keen to demonstrate their social and environmental responsibility, for a long list of reasons including brand, reputation, customer loyalty, security of supply, avoiding government intervention, driver for innovation, cost savings and more.

So what about us as coaches? On the one hand much of what we do is inherently good. But I find it interesting at conferences how many questions I get asked which are actually fishing for how well am I doing, how much am I charging, where are the market opportunities and what is the next big thing. It's all about money. Which is fair enough given that it can be tough to earn a living in coaching and money is important for choices, freedoms (in some senses), and providing for those we care about.

But what about our social and environmental impact - not just through our direct actions in how we travel and do we do pro bono and the like, but in the fuller picture of what our collaborative work with clients brings into the world?

For me I reached tipping point a few months ago. Frankly I'm fed up with a me/more/now client agenda. So I'm upfront now in saying if this assignment is just about performance/profitability without bringing more net good and health into the world I'm probably not the best coach for you and I'd be delighted to recommend another coach who will likely serve better. I'm upfront in discussing what they feel the legacy of this work will be, how it will be seen in a local and global context, how our grandchildren may judge it, and is our aspiration for good big enough.

It's been a "coming out" experience. I was very scared of a backlash. I was very scared of ridicule. I was very scared of starving. That hasn't happened. It's a joy. It opens whole new conversations.

With clients as experts and guides, how about we step into the unknown and begin to discover the world beyond consumerism?

Neil Scotton, PCC, August 2011

Key Take-off Points - When Building Your Coaching Practice

For many coaches, starting your own practice can be a lot like a plane on a runway. You have chosen your course. (I want to be a coach.) You have done careful preparation taking on all the fuel and supplies you think you will need. (Taking great training and setting aside what you think is enough time and money.) You may have even fastened your seat belt in anticipation of a bumpy ride. And there you sit at the start of the runway. (Ready to commit to do whatever it takes to start your own coaching practice.)

With engines blaring, you start to move down the runway. (You commit to get out there and find some clients.) You notice you are moving quite slowly at first but the speed is increasing. It's exciting. (This is the early stage in your practice building where you are full of hope and expectation but you haven't really accomplished anything yet.)

Halfway down the runway, engines still roaring, you notice things are speeding up, there is a lot of activity but you haven't gained any altitude. (This is the stage of your coaching practice when you have been running around telling people about coaching, offering sample sessions to folks that either aren’t interested or can’t afford it. Yet you remain hopeful.)

Three quarters of the way down the runway, you have expended a ton of energy, the engines on the plane continue to roar, you are running faster than ever, and yet, you have still not gained one inch of altitude. (This is the stage in your practice building when you may start to wonder, "Am I ever going to make it? Am I cut out to be a self-employed coach? I have been running around doing everything I can think of but I still have no clients. Maybe this is a really bad idea.")

While the particulars of this experience are as diverse as the individuals involved, this is an incredibly common and problematic moment in the journey into the atmosphere of building a viable coaching practice.

In reality, there are some planes (lovely, well-trained, well-intentioned, deeply committed souls) who, despite their best efforts, will not get off the ground this time.

If this is you, the kindest thing that can happen is for someone to point out that it doesn't look like you are going to make it off the ground this time. (So you can cut your losses, learn your lessons, adjust your plans, get a temporary day job so you can build up new reserves and try again later.)

However, even for the really well-prepared, highly-determined future coach who has done everything right, (taken great training, paid attention to the marketing, found a niche, put in the hours, asked for help along the way, worked past their limiting doubts and fears, etc.,) this is a critical moment in their takeoff. Because if you falter, if you do not fully commit to going the extra mile, putting in the last bit of energy, finding your way past your mounting anxiety - you will not get off the ground.

Making this critical call, whether to cut the engines and lean on the brakes before you crash and burn, or keep your engines blaring and go for broke - is never easy. It is not a decision you ever want to make rashly or simply on your emotions. (Because everyone is scared at this point and if you let your fear make the decision, you will never get off the ground. And if you let pride or blind ambition make the call, you may be risking far too much.)

Pilots call this point on a runway V1, the agonizing point after which you are fully committed to take off because you don't have enough runway to safely slow down. In launching your coaching business, this point when you are three-quarters of the way down your launching runway is definitely the time to check your fuel (how much reserves do you have left), check your speed (what you have learned to date, what is working for you so far, does it look like you are going to make it, etc.). Most importantly, it is a critical time to check in with a few other experienced pilots (fellow coaches) who have been down this runway many times before and can help you make a good call.

It is exceedingly hard when a good coach has to put the brakes on a dream they have to build their own practice. However, if they do it right, they will survive to try again another day and they will be much wiser. (Most successful entrepreneurs have many failure-to-launch stories. Wisdom comes from experience and experience in business is just another word for many past mistakes.)

However, the biggest sadness I encounter is when I see a future coach who definitely has what it takes, who has done enough of the right things and who you just know can succeed - give up on their dream, just because they ran out of faith. (Usually right before they are about to take flight.)

It is only in the last little bit of the runway that you get enough wind under your wings to begin to gain appreciable altitude. And once you are off the ground, the sky is the limit.

Bottom line is, getting a business off the ground is rarely easy. It will usually test everything you have. You don't want to give up prematurely and you also don't want to ride a losing venture right into the ground.

Don't try to be a proud, lonely hero. Reach out and learn from a few others who have come down this runway before. (They are all around you and are usually happy to help.)

Steve Mitten CPCC, MCC
2005 ICF President
President ACOACH4U.COM
http://www.acoach4u.com/

Got to use: coaching tools

Last month, we asked our Facebook fans “what is your go-to coaching tool that you use the most frequently in your coaching practice?”

Several responses were shared and all are listed below for your reference. If you aren’t already using some of these tools in your coaching, consider how you can incorporate them into your own practice.

“My intuition.” (Allison Crow Flanigin)

“Quotes, they provide me with inspiration [from Believe in You, To YOUR Success and all the famous people out there].” (Queenie TCoach)

“Back to the Basics (usually the P2W method).” (Mimi Nelson)

“Open heart and intuition.” (Dóra Hegedũs)

“Lateral thinking tools, such as C&S along with PO.” (Daniel Tolson)

“My own intuition and opening heart.” (Sercan Savran)

“Curiosity.” (Michelle Clarke)

“Love.” (Zohra Dali)

“Transactional Analysis to help clients work out why some interactions go smoothly and why others go pear shaped.” (Redgate Consulting)

“The best coaching tool is…the Coach!” (João Catalão)

“Coaching is really a form of healing. Who you’re ‘being’ as a coach as a ‘model of excellence’ heals, intuition, mindfulness, etc. Which tools from which school of thought one uses plays a smaller role.” (Johnathan Brooks)

“I combine BEING present, focusing on desired outcome, curiosity and intuition. Holding these intentions allows each moment to unfold perfectly for my clients.” (Matt Naskrent)

“Silence. Learning how to actively listen—and then some—made all the difference in the world to my coaching success.” (Darcy Eikenberg)

“Listening intuitively.” (Ayca Gencoglu)

“The Core Protocols and Commitments.” (Vickie Gray)

“The creative use of ‘white space’ before and after each coaching session.” (Richard Pett)

“I go on a curious journey with the client to support them to find their own direction and actions that will take them where they need to go. Tools? Me being present and keep asking questions and give back what the client says.” (Jeanine Eshuis-Hamaker)

“I use Wheel of Life.” (Anil Santhapuri)

What about you? What is your must-use tool in your coaching? We’d love to know—share it with us on at Facebook.com/ICFHQ.

Coaching Minor Youth – What about the parents?

Coaching youth, especially minor youth who live at home with involved parents, can be a challenge. It’s important for the coach to have strongly defined boundaries and a firm policy on confidentiality. It is also important for the coach to bring parents into the coaching relationship enough to support the youth being coached, while maintaining confidentiality. It is also imperative for the coach to be clear that it is the youth (their child) that is your client.

Maintaining confidentiality of the youth client is key to the success of the coaching. Whether the parents, the school or another organization hires you, the youth themselves are the client.

ICF Code of Ethics in section 4 includes Confidentiality/Privacy:
“I will maintain the strictest levels of confidentiality with all client and sponsor information. I will have a clear agreement or contract before releasing information to another person, unless required by law.” (22)

“I will have a clear agreement upon how coaching information will be exchanged among coach, client and sponsor.” (23)

Although it is not specific to youth, my interpretation is that the parent hiring you would be the ‘sponsor’ and the youth your client. In the U.S. you would need written parental permission to coach a minor. Sometimes, parents believe that since they are the parent and are paying for the coaching, they can be privy to the coaching sessions. Parents often want to be involved, and want to support their child. This is good, but can be a challenge for some coaches to handle.

Coaches need to be clear prior to the beginning of the coaching what the parameters are going to be related to confidentiality. This conversation should happen at some point with both parent and child present, so they each know the other also has the same information.

The ‘Ethics FAQs’ on the ICF website gives an example of this:
Q: I am coaching a 12-year-old boy and his father calls me to ask how it is going. May I speak with him in generalities?
A: Only if your client agrees, or has agreed already in the contract that all three of you have signed.

Youth coaches differ on their levels of parental involvement. Currently there is no agreed upon guideline on how to do this. Here are my recommendations of what to do when coaching minor youth:

• Obtain written parental permission to work with minor youth.
• Youth (regardless of age) should also sign the agreement.
• Prior to this permission, a clear agreement that is understood by both youth and parent explains the limits of confidentiality.
• Include the parent in the intake session.
• Have part of the intake session be without the parent present.
• Include in the agreement how the parent can support their child being coached, and how important information will be shared. (If possible it is best for the youth to do this. If not, I would encourage this sharing to be done with the youth present).
• Follow all legal, moral and ethical expectations of you as a coach as well as any other professional codes (e.g.: social workers, counselors, psychologists, educators, etc.) related to breaking confidentiality (e.g.: mandatory reporting, duty to warn, subpoenas, etc.).
• If the parent is having difficulty, consider finding a parent coach to support the parent with the process, as the child is coached.

If you coach youth and would like more support, or would like to connect with other youth coaches, please contact me for information on how to join the ICF Teen Coaching SIG.

If you're interested in receiving News & Information to support your work with teens and young adults, sign up here.

Sandi Lindgren, LICSW, PCC
sandi@isupportyouth.com